Author Archives: Morgan

For Jack.

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On Monday, my best friend died.  He was my best boy, my good sweet boy, and I miss him terribly.  No other friend, four footed or two, was as gentle, loving, or giving as he was, and everyone he met smiled just a bit more after spending time with him.  In honor of him, I offer these remembrances of his life.

I remember the first day we met.  You were the last kitten at the Alley Kat pet store at Jantzen Beach.  I watched you playing in the little display, just having a grand ole time all by yourself.  I handed over my 70 bucks to buy you.  They were out of pet carriers, so they put you in an empty cricket box, and you meowed the whole way out to the car.  Once we were in the car, I let you out because your crying was breaking my heart, it was so pathetic.  You proceeded to climb up to my left shoulder, and there is where you stayed whenever we drove anywhere, until you were too big to fit.  I wanted a unique, exotic name for you, but every time I tried to think of one, the name “Jack” would pop into my head.  “Jack?  Nah that’s too boring” I kept thinking, but no other name would come.  So Jack is what I named you.  It was the perfect name for you.

I remember you and Sam working together to raid the cat treats, which I kept in a closet 6 feet off the ground.  Now that was absolutely amazing.  I’m glad I could catch you in the act.

I remember you being a master at catching flying things.  Bugs, birds, it didn’t matter.  Your first effort, however, was a fly…and you missed.  I’m glad I got pictures of that.

I remember you hopping sideways like a little halloween cat, all bristling tail and arched back, when we would play.

I remember you climbing in between the blanket and the sheet while I was sleeping, and then pounce on my feet with your sharp little kitten claws..ouch!!

I remember you introducing me to all my neighbors, whether or not I wanted to, by inviting yourself into their houses.  I loved that about you.

I remember you patiently letting Tori pounce on your tail repeatedly while you where sleeping, and the only thing you did when you had enough is just stalk away somewhere where she wouldn’t see you.  You were the gentlest big brother I’ve ever seen.  You were gentle with all the little ones. 

I remember I could pick you up and drop you into anyone’s arms, and you’d give them a big purr, a head butt and a kiss on the nose (sometimes).  But you always had one for me. 

I remember you making the vet’s office your own, along with the hearts of everyone who worked there.

I remember you sleeping in the grass near that old barn, and all the barn swallows whose nest I caught you raiding were dive bombing your head to drive you away, and you slept right through it.

I remember the catnip play fighting you and Sam always had.  And you always won.

I remember taking you for walks around NW Portland.  With no leash.  You would just follow me whereever I went, and if you strayed behind I would just call you and you’d come running.

And lots of times you’d follow me when I didn’t want you to, like the time I was having lunch at the restaurant down the street from my house, and you nearly got hit by a car trying to cross the street when you saw me.  Everyone who was eating lunch outside at that restaurant yelled out when you stepped off the curb, it was that close.

I remember I would put a little black bowtie around your neck at parties, and you’d happily greet everyone as they came in.

I remember how you would always be there for me.  No matter what.  Ever.  You were always ready to snuggle and kiss my nose, even for 5 minutes.  Or 5 hours.  Even if you’d just finished eating.

I remember letting a 2 year old carry you around.  And you let her.  You didn’t have to.

I wish I could remember more.  I wish I could’ve taken better care of you.  I’m so sorry.  I hope you forgive me.  If anyone deserves to be in a better place now, it’s you.  You will always be in my heart.  I miss you, Jack, and I will always.

native tourist

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Today was my day to play tourist in Boston.  It’s kind of strange, being a tourist in a place that you sort of considered your home at one point.  Not that I lived here, but I lived close enough that it had some familiar places, ones I remember from my childhood.  I got to visit those places today.

I hopped on the Green Line from Boston College to Government Center.  On the way, I passed Boston University, and wondered what my life would’ve been like if I’d gone to BU instead of Syracuse.  Would I still be living here?  BU was high on my list; I did get accepted, but opted for Syracuse (aka hell) because it was further away from home.  I was in a big rush to get as far away as possible.  Apparently NY state wasn’t far enough either 😀

Once off the train, I walked around and got my bearings.  The station drops you off right at City Hall, which is right near the Old State Building and tons of history.  In fact the whole city is just dripping with it.  I took LOTS of pictures.  I was fascinated with how there was such a blend of old and new architecture; everything from the classic roman styles of the 1700’s, to the Art Nouveau styles of the 1800-1900’s, to the skyscrapers of today.  In one single shot I could encompass that entire spectrum – it was pretty cool.  Not to mention the fantastic details on some of the buildings, and of course all the neat old stuff.  So yeah, lots of pics.  Anyway…

I first went to Fanieul Hall, the place I loved to go to all the time.  It’s the Boston version of Pike Place in Seattle, without all the fish.  There’s even a Cheers bar there, where I stopped and had a pint of Sam Adams Boston Lager.  And I bought a mug.

Trucked around there for a while, bought some food here and there (no, no chowdah!) and got a little boat in a bottle kit with a replica of the Bounty (as in Mutiny on the…)  Then I decided it was time to do the most ultra-touristy thing I always wanted to do and never did when I lived around here:  Walk the Freedom Trail!  Actually I only did a little piece of it, the part that goes south from Fanieul Hall.  It includes the Old State House, the Old Meeting House, the First Public School Site, and the Kings’ Chapel and Burying Ground.  There were some tombstones there from the 1600’s!  Wow.  Hard to read tho 😀  I missed the Boston Massacre site (it’s easy to miss, since as I recall it was in the middle of an intersection), and all the stuff north of Fanieul Hall, such as Paul Revere’s House and the USS Constitution.  But still, it was fun, and I took tons of pics. 

Tomorrow I go home.  I don’t get back until 11pm or so, so I won’t see my puppy until the day after, which is my birthday, and also the day my license expires 😛  Good thing I’m waking up on Boston time now, I’ll have time to take care of that before work (hopefully).

RedEye

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You may have noticed on my previous blog about my flight to Boston that I referred to the first leg of my flight as disturbing:  Previous Blog Posting

Now for the why. 

I sat on one of the aisle seats.  There were 3 seats on each side; a window, middle and aisle seat.  When I got to my seat, 6D, there was already someone sitting in the middle seat.  A somewhat attractive young man, probably in his early to mid 20’s, middle eastern, with an extremely straggly beard that he had obviously never shaved. In other words, a nice young (quite possibly) Muslim guy.  Now I do my best to not let prejudices bother me, but this guy was just creepy, once you sat next to him for any period of time.  He looked eXTREMEly nervous.  His eyes where kinda shifty.  He did not smile, or anything.  The one word he spoke to the flight attendant later, “Water”, was the only word he spoke the entire flight (out loud) and that with an accent.  Taken on their own, I wouldn’t have thought anything of it, but in one package?  Oy.  Maybe if I’d told him my father was Muslim (not really, he just told people that) he would’ve relaxed.  Until I told him my mother was Jewish, ha!  However I, always trying to assume good intent, chalked it up to perhaps he was afraid of flying. I hope.

The window seat was empty, so I felt a bit concerned that I would be sitting alone with him at this point.  It wasn’t until the very last that another lady sat in the window seat, which made me feel a bit better.

So we start taxiing down the runway, and young muslim dude starts muttering to himself.  Or maybe he was praying.  He was obviously very disturbed about something, because he kept it up for a solid half hour or so.  Are you getting a picture of this now?  Young, unfriendly, muslim, nervous, on plane, with accent, talking/praying/muttering to himself?  Good.  Let’s continue…

I was pretty desperate to get some sleep on this flight.  It was only about 4.5 hours, and I wouldn’t really have any chance to get any decent sleep afterwards; this was my only shot.  I did stay up long enough to get my little shuteye kit, since it had ear plugs and a sleeping mask, which was a big help.  I also wanted to get some soup to warm me up.  Once I got that all settled (they initially claimed to not have any soup, but they ‘found one in the back’.  I didn’t ask) I slapped on my mask, attempted to squeeze the earplugs in despite the fact that they did not remain rolled up for longer than a nanosecond no matter how much you rolled and squeezed, and tried to get some sleep.  Muslim boy apparently had the same idea, which was all good with me.  He had found a blanket somewhere and was doing something underneath it, but I tried really hard not to think about that.  I mean, he did have his mask on too…

I woke up about an hour later.  Muslim boy had his elbow clearly in my personal space, pushing on me a little with it, but the hand at the end of that elbow was caressing my leg.  And squeezing.  And stuff.  I shifted and tried to move away (ha! I might as well be a sardine!).  But nothing, he just squeezed and stroked my leg.  I looked at him and he appeared to be asleep.  And the hand seemed to be getting more into it, squeezing harder and more of my leg.  I just sat there, totally dumbfounded, for at *least* 10 seconds before I shot up out of my seat and stalked to the bathroom.  And stayed there a good 5 minutes, taking my time.  So much for my attempt to get as much sleep as possible, since I had lover muslim boy next to me.  I mean, cute can only take you so far, and everything else was just…creepy.  I sat in there trying to figure out what if anything I should do.  I mean, it’s entirely likely that he *was* still sleeping, and was….sleep…fondling?  Brother.

I went back to my seat.  Sat down.  Muslim boy had shifted away…good.  I slapped the mask back on and went back to sleep, thankfully for the majority of the rest of the flight. 

Fun stuff.

Now that the triptophan has worn off…

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What I’m thankful for:

1. I have the dog I always wanted.  I just didn’t realize what I was asking for! 😀

2. My friends.  I have some of the best friends on the planet, bar none.  Period.  They may not always be there, we may have our moments where we disagree, or our lives are just misfiring, but that’s why I have more than one friend.  They all seem to take up each other’s slack.

3. My job.  As much as I complain and bitch and moan about how much it sucks, it’s still a damn good job.  Far better than many people I know.

4. My house.  This has been a long time coming.  I’ve dreamed all my life of owning my own house (ok not really all my life, but mostly since I’ve been in apartments).  I finally have a place of my own, that no one can take from me as long as I make my payments.  No one, ever.  I have final say in everything that happens, and no one has the right or the place to second guess me.  That is a mixed blessing, since now no one else is responsible for this property, but it’s worth it.

5. My family.  It’s not a bad family.  There are people in it I’m proud of, and people in it I’m not.  But they’ve known me longer than anyone, and that feels kinda good when you can sit and reminisce about stuff that no one else but the group of you remembers.

6. My mind.  Not that I’m smart, or witty, or even considerate or anything.  But I always am questioning.  Always.  And while that can lead me into trouble, I don’t often find myself second guessing myself.  But I am always questioning my direction, my motives, my desires, to make sure I’m on the right path, whatever that may be.

7. The universe.  It knows what the fuck it’s doing, even if I usually don’t, and remembering that always makes everything else better.  I just may not like what the plans are for me, but this life is not about me…it’s about the universe.  I learned that we’re here for one purpose, and one purpose alone: to live and love.  Learning from your past is just a bonus.

That’s a pretty good list.  There are many things I find lacking in it, but then my standards are way high sometimes.  Most of the things I find missing are things I find missing in myself, not in my life, and only because I’m not 100% sure of those things; like integrity, honesty and compassion.  I think I could have more of those things in my character.  And about 30 pounds less fat.  But no one’s perfect 😀

Home sweet home

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I flew to Boston today to spend Thanksgiving with my family – my brother and his wife, and my mom.  It was a rough flight; a disturbing red eye from pdx to ny, layover in ny for about 2 hours and then a short hop to boston.  I was not too keen on the idea that I had to have a layover just so I could take a 45 minute flight from ny to boston, but a funny thing happened.

I landed in ny about 40 minutes late, stepped out of the plane and into JFK international, one of two airports in new york.  NYC, my hometown.  A place I haven’t been to since 1998, well before September 11th and all its insanity.  I stepped foot in my hometown, and felt my heart break.  At the same time, it felt good to be home, even tho it was in an airport I don’t remember ever stepping foot in (I think we always went to LaGuardia) and I was only there for about half an hour.

So to start off my next blog post…I’m thankful I had a layover in NY today.

You come to watch, yes?

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Went to see Borat this weekend, and I just have one thing to say:

Ouch.

This movie takes you places you never, ever, ever, EVER EVER EVER wanted to go, and then goes one step further.  And then another.  And ANOTHER.  It’s like watching a 10 car pileup on the freeway…you really don’t want to see anything, but you keep watching because you can’t stop yourself.

Words that pop to mind when I think back on that psyche-burning experience:

motel room

stop stop oh no they didn’t

they’re gonna kill him

what did he say??

omg he didn’t just say that

but he’s jewish!!

I would’ve killed him!

I think the fact that the way they filmed it, you’re not sure if the people he’s talking to are actors or not.  I’m leaning towards not.  I think they actually are filming people who have no idea that they’re being filmed for a movie.  And that’s what makes those scary impending death scenes that much more scary…because I really think they would’ve ganged up and killed him if he’d taken another step.  The dinner at the magnolia house was priceless though.

By the way…I laughed so hard it hurt.  I just watched the trailer (I’d never seen it) and it made me laugh so hard I cried.  But then I know what they DON’T show.

I’d have to say that you need to see this movie, but be prepared for anything.  ANYTHING.  Be warned.

Las Vegas, Days Two Three and Four

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Ok I know I’ve been slacking on this Vegas trip as far as blogging goes, but MAN am I exhausted!  Here’s a quick summary of events since Monday night:

Monday night:  Had dinner with Gunny, his girlfriend and Dai.  Nice buncha people!  And Gunny (David) you’re a bastard for paying for everyone.  If anyone else goes to Vegas, you gotta take HIM out for once, to make up for me and Darkmajic too apparently…

Tuesday: Lotsa sessions.  Info overload.  One of the sessions was an inside look into MSNBC.com, which was …depressing actually.  A lot of the problems that they had, we’re having, and the things they did to fix those problems, are the opposite of what we’re doing.  It’s just sad.  I did get a much-coveted VIP pass (they only had several to hand out to people who where not already specifically invited based on a resume submission) to go to a behind-the-scenes look at a major news website covering one of the biggest stories a news site covers in a year – Election Night.  Little did I know that not only would I be rubbing elbows with the upper management of MSNBC, but they would be providing most excellent hors d’ourves AND an open bar.  Niiiice. 

Tuesday Evening: Anyway 7:30 rolled around, which is when they where supposed to wrap things up, but the msnbc guys decided they wanted to keep the party going, so they invited some of the attendees to join them at Mix, a swanky bar on Floor 64 of “THE Hotel”, a new high-rise suite-only hotel connected to the Mandalay Bay.  It had an open patio area.  ON the 64th floor.  Wow.  Not to mention the fact that they paid the bill for everyone who showed up.  I swear the bar tab must’ve been around 1000 bucks, with ten people drinking $6+ drinks for 3 hours, plus appetizers.  I ended up stumbling back to my hotel around 1am.  A fun night.

Wednesday: I played hooky for a bit in the morning, which I had pretty much planned on since there weren’t really any sessions going on in the morning that I wanted to attend.  So I hit the pool for a few hours, to soak up some sun while I had a chance.  I knew I wouldn’t be seeing any sun for a loooong time once I got back home.  The rest of the day was uneventful, just attending sessions. 

Wednesday night: Had dinner with mom instead at the mandalay bay buffet.  It had a chocolate fountain!  yuuuummm….with marshmellows.  And Lychees in the fruit section!  Oi was I full.

Thursday: LOTS of good sessions to choose from today.  I had trouble picking ones, and wished I had some others with me so we could split up and compare notes afterwards.  I ended up checking out a session on accessible website for people with disabilities (one of my personal torches at work) and another on the provider framework, which was really great.  But there where another 3-4 I would’ve liked to have gone to as well.  At least I can download all the demos and stuff after the conference!

Thursday night: Dinner with mom again, this time at one of those station casinos.  Got paid today, so I could actually gamble some, and of course mostly lost on the slots.  I did make a little over 10 dollars back on the last one I played, adn walked away feeling somewhat redeemed.  Then I played some roulette, and made 30 bucks!  Still overall at a loss, but that made it a little better…

Now I’m all packed up (mostly) and ready to check out tomorrow.  My plane doesn’t leave until 11pm tho.  I have my last workshop from 8-4, so I have to check out before then, and then leave my stuff with the bag guys.  Frankly I can’t wait to be home.  I miss my puppy.  I managed to not spend hundreds of dollars on cute little doggy tshirts and pink doggie goggles, but I did take a card!  I might have to splurge a bit if I get a decent return on tax day 😀

Can’t wait to be home, like I said.  I don’t really like Vegas this trip.  Probably a combination of lack of money, lack of companionship, and info overload. 

You all have to call me after Friday and make plans to hang out so I can get the bitter taste of loneliness outta my mouth…

Day Two. Viva Las Vegas!

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I am SO exhausted (see current mood).  So I’m gonna blog about today, tomorrow.  Or yesterday, later today to be exact.

/yawn.

gnite!

PS  Apparently computer geeks are a really good catch, cuz 98% of them are married.  And the rest have girlfriends or boyfriends..  THbththbhbhthhttttbbbtbtbtb.

Day One – Vegas

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I got to Vegas without much ado, and now I sit here in front of my laptop for which I paid TWELVE DOLLARS!!! to access the internet for 24 hours!  I agree, that’s highway robbery!  Anyway, my mom picked me up at the airport and took me to the Luxor to check in.  There was a HUGE line at the registration desk, so that took quite a while, but it was my very first chance to flash my government visa!  We went to have brunch afterwards at Paris, and then my mom dragged me all over the hotels trying to cash in all her player points for a show or two.  We finally got two tickets to the Improv at Harrah’s.  The show didn’t start till 8:30, so during the 3 or so hours we had to kill we had some drinks at the Carnaval Court, which is an outdoor bar next to Harrah’s with cute bartenders with “Flair”.  Think Cocktail but without the attitude, cuz they drop the bottles sometimes and don’t seem to care.  There’s a live band doing a bunch of covers, mostly U2 and 70’s rock.  I think the lead singer thought he sounded like Bono because he dressed like him and had his hair like him and they did do alot of U2 covers…but I thought he was just ok.  /shrug

Anyway after that got boring (although how boring can cute funny bottle-flipping bartenders get?) we went back inside to the karaoke bar.  That was satisfyingly disturbing, as karaoke always is.  You could tell that the drunk people where starting to come out!  We went to the Improv then, which was fun.  The comedians where pretty funny…not as funny as some others I’ve seen in portland, but then they where doing portland-specific stuff sometimes, and its always funnier when you have personal experience.  The headliner guy was Dat Phan, that vietnamese comedian who won the Last Comic Standing thing.  All in all a good night.  I got to back to my hotel and collapsed.

Today I ordered room service!  OMG it was 24 dollars for breakfast!?!?!?!  Yeah.  Not gonna do that again.  It was good tho.  I hauled myself down to the Mandalay Bay convention area, which is totally like a two mile walk.  Next door my ass!  The first workshop was really good (I won’t bore you with the details, my non-techie friends!) and the lunch was nice.  Catered.  In a HUGE ballroom.  The second one was a little less interesting, so I ducked out an hour early to go back to my hotel.  I tried to take a shortcut which ended up being a non-shortcut  and had to walk all the way back to where I started, so by the time I got back to my hotel I was TIRED.  And my feet hurt cuz I was trying to wear cute shoes with heels (Yes I have some).  Tonight I’m having dinner with some guildies from world of warcraft who live here (translation: they are friends of mine, who I game with, and we are all in a ‘guild’ in the game together and do lots of stuff in the game together, but I’ve never actually met them in person.  Kinda like myspace friends!).  Until then, I’m gonna relax and read my book.  Hopefully I’ll find some time to hit the pool…wednesday looks like it might be a light day for me, not alot of presentations I’m interested in, but all the other days are gonna be tight.

Miss you all, miss my home, and miss my babies.

PS – speaking of babies, there’s a pet store I pass between mandalay bay and the luxor.  It’s the kind of pet store you’d see paris hilton in…certainly caters to accessory dogs.  But I think I might have to buy some stuff for jessie there.  They have a shirt that has a doggie buddha that says rub my belly!  And pink doggie goggles!  Help me, please!!!)

Vegas Busted.

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I’m goin to Vegas next week.  No, no, I have to go for work.  Yes, work.  No really, it’s a convention.  Of course I won’t be working 24-7, so there is the potential for some partying to occur, if it weren’t for one, eensy teensy little wrinkle:  I’m broke.  Really broke.  I haven’t been this broke in a long time.  I’ve depleted all my stashes that I feel comfortable depleting, and some of the ones I don’t feel comfortable depleting.  It really, really sucks.  Especially when I’m going to Vegas.  I’m going to Vegas with no money at all to spend on fun.  And I’m gonna be there for a week!  A week of no money to spend on fun things in Vegas!  Damn.

This sucks!