Now that the triptophan has worn off…

What I’m thankful for:

1. I have the dog I always wanted.  I just didn’t realize what I was asking for! 😀

2. My friends.  I have some of the best friends on the planet, bar none.  Period.  They may not always be there, we may have our moments where we disagree, or our lives are just misfiring, but that’s why I have more than one friend.  They all seem to take up each other’s slack.

3. My job.  As much as I complain and bitch and moan about how much it sucks, it’s still a damn good job.  Far better than many people I know.

4. My house.  This has been a long time coming.  I’ve dreamed all my life of owning my own house (ok not really all my life, but mostly since I’ve been in apartments).  I finally have a place of my own, that no one can take from me as long as I make my payments.  No one, ever.  I have final say in everything that happens, and no one has the right or the place to second guess me.  That is a mixed blessing, since now no one else is responsible for this property, but it’s worth it.

5. My family.  It’s not a bad family.  There are people in it I’m proud of, and people in it I’m not.  But they’ve known me longer than anyone, and that feels kinda good when you can sit and reminisce about stuff that no one else but the group of you remembers.

6. My mind.  Not that I’m smart, or witty, or even considerate or anything.  But I always am questioning.  Always.  And while that can lead me into trouble, I don’t often find myself second guessing myself.  But I am always questioning my direction, my motives, my desires, to make sure I’m on the right path, whatever that may be.

7. The universe.  It knows what the fuck it’s doing, even if I usually don’t, and remembering that always makes everything else better.  I just may not like what the plans are for me, but this life is not about me…it’s about the universe.  I learned that we’re here for one purpose, and one purpose alone: to live and love.  Learning from your past is just a bonus.

That’s a pretty good list.  There are many things I find lacking in it, but then my standards are way high sometimes.  Most of the things I find missing are things I find missing in myself, not in my life, and only because I’m not 100% sure of those things; like integrity, honesty and compassion.  I think I could have more of those things in my character.  And about 30 pounds less fat.  But no one’s perfect 😀