Soo…I’m trying to get pregnant. I know I know, yikes! There goes my happy-go-lucky life with nary a care in the world. Hello baby bottles and baby poo, sleep deprivation (really, is there any better drug than that?? I think not!!) and worst of all, a money sponge like no other.
Yes, all my friends are doing it. And while I have to admit it *does* play a part, it certainly is not the primary motivating factor. But come on…one can only be surrounded by babies of varying ages on a constant basis and be in the prime of your baby-carrying life for so long without being affected.
When I was much younger, (say oh, 22, for grins) I made a Decision. I decided that I would Decide whether or not I wanted to have kids when I was 30. It was one of my two biggest Decisions I’ve made in this lifetime, and I adhered to it (by not deciding!) until I turned 30, a scant few years back. Yes, yes it was a SCANT!! dammit.
Anyway, I turned 30, and I sat down to Decide.
I thought a lot.
And then I Decided.
Before I impart my Decision to you, I want to make one thing clear. Despite the fact that is was only a few years ago, the people I am friends with now who have children either a) I did not know then or b) were not yet planning to have kids. So, the current baby-heavy atmosphere I find myself in now was NOT a factor when I made my Decision.
I Decided that I did indeed want to have children. Someday.
My Decision was based on one thing: I realized that when I lay on my death bed (assuming I get that luxury! Would that be a luxury? I dunno…) I would feel…empty…if I didn’t have children. If I didn’t create a family. If I didn’t have children to impart the lessons I have learned, whether or not they choose to learn them. Although I find that even when children don’t take their parents lessons to heart at first, they usually do later! I would regret it more than anything else.
And I also realized that children is the one true path to immortality. The one real way to leave your mark on the world is to create love and family while you’re here.
So I got that outta the way. Took me about an hour.
But notice, I didn’t specify when! I just figured I would know when the time is right.
And the time is right…right now. So wish me luck!